One-Liners
Don’t let your worries get the best of you. Remember, Moses started out as a basket case. Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited – until you try to sit in their pews. Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live
Only in America
Only in America…..do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in America……do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke! Only in America……do banks leave both doors open and then chain the
Ever Wonder?
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can’t put on mascara with their mouths closed? Why you don’t ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery”? Why “abbreviated” is such a long word? Why doctors call what they do “practice”? Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid
College Freshmen in 2005
The following are highlights from the mindset list of freshmen entering college in 2005. These findings from the class of 2009 were compiled by professors at Beloit College. “Cut and paste” never involved scissors. Pay-per-view television has always been an option. They ever had the fun of being thrown into the back of a station
Seven Essentials of Church Building Projects
Mike Hankins (as seen in Rev Magazine, July/August 2005) Commit to the overall project budget early in the process. If you can afford $2 million, don’t have an architect design an $8 million project. Hankins says a typical formula used by lending institutions to determine a “ballpark figure” for what your church can afford is: three times your annual
Various Statistics
How do airline travelers avoid conversations with the people sitting next to them? (Rev Magazine, 2005)Start reading—49%Put on earphones or listen to music—41%Pretend to be asleep—27%Get up to go to the restroom or to stretch legs—19%Ask to be left alone—10%Change seats—9%Lie—7%Play sick—4%15 Conservative scholars were asked to rank the 10 most harmful books of the 19th
9 Habits of Effective Churches
(Barna Research Group) Highly effective churches rely upon strategic leadership. Highly effective churches are organized to facilitate highly effective ministry. Highly effective churches emphasize developing significant relationships within the congregation. Highly effective churches invest themselves in genuine worship. Highly effective churches engage in strategic evangelism. Highly effective churches get their people involved in systematic theological
Do You Have a Written Pastor’s Job Description?
From a poll conducted by Rev Magazine (www.onlinerev.com), printed in the November/December 2005 issue: “Do you have a written pastor’s job description?” 47% No, and I don’t need one. 19% Yes, I have one, but it is more than two years old. 18% Yes, I have one that is less than two years old. 15%
From a Poll Conducted by Rev Magazine
From a poll conducted by Rev Magazine (www.onlinerev.com), printed in the November/December 2005 issue: Knowing what you know today about pastoral ministry, would you become a church pastor again? 60% Yes, without a doubt. 33% Probably, but I would do a lot of things differently. 7% Not sure I would. 0% No, without a doubt.
Political Correctness for Kids
Your bedroom isn’t cluttered; it’s “passage-restrictive.” Kids don’t get in trouble anymore. They merely hit “social speed bumps.” You’re not having a bad hair day; you’re suffering from “rebellious follicle syndrome.” No one’s tall anymore. They’re “vertically enhanced.” You’re not shy. You’re “conversationally selective.” You don’t talk a lot. You’re just “abundantly verbal.” It’s not
2005’s Top Five List
The following information was gathered by Just Between Us, a magazine for ministry wives. 97% of readers said their marriages are strong. 93% feel supported in their marriage, and 90% feel supported in their parenting. 83% said they feel supported in their role as a ministry spouse. However, three-fourths want a close friend other than their
When Aging Really Sets In
1. Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. 2. Don’t let anyone tell you you’re getting old. Squash their toes with your rocker. 3. The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. 4. Some people try to turn back