The Gospel According to St. Titleist
1) Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk.
– Grantland Rice
2) Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.
– John Updike
3) It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf.
– Robert Lynd
4) They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.
– Gardner Dickinson
5) If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork as poorly as they do a golf club, they’d starve to death.
– Sam Snead
6) Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
– William Wordsworth
7) If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don’t have to waste energy going back to pick it up.
– Tommy Bolt
8) Man blames fate for all other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole-in-one.
– Bishop Sheen
9) I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they’d come up sliced.
– Arnold Palmer
10) My handicap? Woods and irons.
– Chris Codiroli
11) The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top.
– Pete Dye
12) I’m hitting the woods just great; but having a terrible time getting out of them!
– Buddy Hackett
13) The only time my prayers are never answered is playing golf.
– Billy Graham
14) If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
– Jack Lemmon
15) It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
– Mark Twain
16) Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
– Harry Vardon
17) May thy ball lie in green pastures, and not in still waters.
– Ben Hogan
2ProphetU is an online magazine/website, started by Warren Wiersbe and Michael Catt, to build up the church, seek revival, and encourage pastors.
