Nothing destroys the Christmas spirit faster than looking for a place to park.
Last year a big store in Milwaukee started its Christmas sale so early that Santa Claus wore Bermuda shorts.
Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
Christmas is when we celebrate the birth of the Prince of Peace by giving our kids rockets, machine guns, atom-bomb kits, and tanks.
Keeping Christmas is good, but sharing it with others is much better.
At Christmas most parents spend more money on their children than they did on the honeymoon that started it all.
Christmas is a time for exchanging a lot of things you can’t afford for a lot of things you don’t want.
God shocked the world with a babe, not a bomb.
A father’s biggest difficulty at Christmas time is convincing the children that he is Santa Claus and his wife that he is not.
Christmas is a race to see which gives out first—your money or your feet.
What most of us want for Christmas is the day after.